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WINO
(wi´·
no): One who is chronically addicted to drinking
wine
Merriam-Webster
Looking
for something specific? Try our new Google search bar...
Breaking News!!!
Celebrity
Politician
Train Wreck of the Week!
When we first launched our news feature, Wino of the Week,
we had not anticipated the inevitable. Yes, celebrities love
to over-imbibe and make fools of themselves. Thus,
Celebrity Train Wreck of the Week was born. Back then, no
one would have guessed that politicians may also go
that extra mile and become a total train wreck in public.
Well, apparently it happens. So we are proud to offer a
special
POLITICIAN
version of Celebrity Train Wreck of the Week which we have so
cleverly named Politician Train Wreck of the Week.
(WinoBob, seriously, who thinks this shit up?)
Like our two other world-famous "... of the Week" features,
Politician Train Wreck of the Week will not necessarily appear every
week. Let's hope, for the sake of our government (and our
country), that we don't have weekly nominees...
And our inaugural PTWotW? Well it's none other
than Jersey City, New Jersey Councilman, Steven Lipski.
Woo hoo!! Yipee!! Way to represent, Steve!!!
Bringin' honor back to the Garden State!!!
So, just what did this fine representative of New
Jersey's Democratic party do in order to earn this
less-than-prestigious honor? Well, check this out...
Councilman Lipski allegedly got hammered at a rock
concert and urinated off the balcony on to a crowd of fellow concert
goers down below. (I use the term allegedly because Mr.
Lipski could be a lawyer and we used all the money in our legal
budget to get the 'drunk and disorderly' charges against WinoBob
dropped. Again.) While Mr. Lipski denies actually
pissing on anyone, he was arrested for simple assault. Mr.
Lipski claims that he simply "spilled his drink". He also
vowed to stop drinking...

Politician Train
Wreck of the Week
Jersey City Councilman, Steven Lipski
So, Mr. Lipski, congratulations on being named our
first ever Politician Train Wreck of the Week. The big money
in Vegas was betting on Ted Kennedy but you stunned them all.
Let's just hope that there were no members of your constituency in
the audience below...
WinoJohn
November 14, 2008
Looking for old Breaking
News? click here...
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NEW!
Winery
of the Month
Once again, WinoBob and I had the distinct pleasure of attending an
upscale wine dinner hosted by our pal, Wino Larry Lascola of Bottle
King fame. This time, Larry was featuring the wines of the
world renowned veterinarian/ winemaker, Kent Rosenblum of
Rosenblum Cellars. We were so impressed with the wines that we
felt obligated to publicly honor the winery. So, as a gesture
of good will (and NOT as part of any kind of out-of-court
settlement) we are delighted to name the dinner's featured winery as
WinoStuff's coveted Winery of the Month.
Congratulations are in order for...

In 1978, the good veterinarian Dr. Kent Rosenblum and his wife Kathy
founded Rosenblum Cellars. After nearly three decades of
winemaking, Rosenblum has evolved from a passionate home-winemaking
operation into a world-class winery. Today, Rosenblum Cellars is
recognized as one of America’s most acclaimed producers of zinfandel
and Rhône varietal wines.
With
that kind of industry recognition, you would think that WinoLarry
would know better than to invite WinoBob and I to such a tasteful
event. I guess Larry forgot about the whole Tom Shelton
incident. (No need to recount that episode. We'll
never get invited to another fancy wine dinner...) Bob
and I were pleasantly shocked and surprised upon entering the
Rosenblum dinner to find out that we were to be seated right next to
the honored guest. (Actually, a representative from
Rosenblum's distributor, a woman named Nicole, sat between Kent and
I. While she seemed charming and demure, I think she could
kick my ass...)
I would like to (again) publicly apologize for WinoBob's behavior.
Recognizing an opportunity to take advantage of a captive audience
with a veterinarian, at one point I caught Bob trying to get Kent
Rosenblum to prescribe anti-anxiety meds "for his dog".
Throughout much of the evening WinoBob was intentionally spilling
red wine on the female guests just to prove how well our
Miracle Red Wine Stain Removing Elixir
works! (Unabashed Advertising Note:
WinoStuff's Miracle Red Wine Stain Removing Elixir is available at
Bottle King!) It's no wonder we don't get out much...
So, congratulations, Dr. Rosenblum.
The
dinner was quite entertaining and your wines were delicious.
Fine print: The staff of WinoStuff hereby
officially apologizes in print (NOT in connection with any out-of-court
settlement) to Kent, Larry, the lovely Nicole, and to any other guest in
attendance for anything that may have been said or done which might get
us sued or arrested. Furthermore, we deeply regret if anyone was
accidentally touched inappropriately while red wine was
being removed from their clothing. Thank you for your
understanding in this matter. WinoJohn
October 23, 2008 |
Sponsored
Links!
New Feature!
WinoBabe of the Month!
After several months of enjoying Michelle Edwards'
stint as Wino Babe of the Month (actually we got to enjoy Michelle
for like six months!), it was about time we honored another notable wine
loving woman. This month, WinoStuff looks to the North Jersey Wine
Meetup Group for our newest honoree.

Our latest WinoBabe has become the smiling face of the wine meetup group and
her name is Lindsay. Lindsay something... I don't know her last
name. But that's OK. There is nothing in the WinoBabe rulebook
that says you need a last name.
So, congratulations go out to Lindsay something. You are
WinoStuff.com's latest
WinoBabe of the Month!
...click here for the WinoBabe
Hall of Fame
Got Stains?
Get Elixir!

WinoStuff Magical
Red Wine Stain Removing Elixir
Developed by NASA!
(not really...)
Used on the Space Shuttle!
(we wish...)
As seen on TV!
(as far as you know...)
Not available in stores!
(actually, it IS available in stores. Go to any Bottle King location!)
Order now!!!
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